GRATITUDE
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God
— Philippians 4:6
A Reflection on Gratitude
Trevor Lubiens
About three years after we were married, my wife and I felt like we were ready to grow our family and start having kids. Because of my wife’s successful battle with childhood cancer and the measure taken to help her through that, we knew having biological children could be difficult for us. What we didn’t know was how long, difficult, and painful the journey would be.
About a year and a half into our infertility journey, it felt like every single family in the world except us was able to get pregnant. At one point, 11 of the 17 couples in our Sunday school class had either just given birth or were expecting. No matter what we did we could not escape the constant reminders of what we didn’t have. Even worse, we were allowing our circumstances to take away our joy, peace, and passion for life.
We prayed. We prayed a ton. And eventually, our prayers turned from prayers of pleading for what we wanted, to prayers of gratitude and seeking God’s will. Practicing gratitude changed everything for us. Instead of ruminating on the lack of a life we wanted, we were able to take advantage of the life we had. We were grateful for each other and for the freedom that an empty nest offered. And eventually, the ultimate expression of gratitude showed up when some of our closest friends gave birth to their firstborn, and we were able to genuinely celebrate with them! Gratitude didn’t eliminate the sadness we felt over our still empty crib in the nursery, but gratitude gave us the opportunity to experience true joy with our friends in that moment.
Anxiety is grasping for a hold of what we do not have in the future. Gratitude is being thankful for what we do have in the present.
Gratitude is a state of being thankful for the good in your life rather than only focusing on the negatives. Gratitude is the state of much of the apostle Paul’s life. Paul wrote a letter to a group of Jesus' followers in the city of Philippi while he was in jail and with the knowledge that his execution was near. Even in the midst of these circumstances, Paul wrote, “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Phil 4v7
Our mission as Midtown is to follow Jesus, to live with purpose, and to do so in community. Paul is one of the best examples of our mission and gratitude is one of the hallmark virtues of both Jesus and Paul. Both Jesus and Paul exemplified a life of gratefulness in the midst of any circumstance.
“A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue but the parent of all the other virtues.”
—Cicero
There are two main ingredients to becoming more like Jesus—God’s power and human intention. The following practices are designed to help you create intentional time and space for God’s holy spirit to transform you from the inside out to become more like Jesus.
Gratitude Practice - Journaling
Time Required
Ideally, keeping a gratitude journal would be a daily practice. Find some time in your day when you are unhurried and can be intentional about this practice. Many people write in their gratitude journals during their time of morning or evening prayer.
Gratitude Journal Style Options
There’s no wrong way to keep a gratitude journal, but here are some ideas and options as you get started. But remember, the physical record is important—don’t just do this exercise in your head.
- Simple - Write down up to five things for which you feel grateful.
- Specific - Think of something you’re grateful for in life, and then spend the time reflecting on & writing down what you’re grateful for, why you’re grateful, and how being grateful impacts your life.
- Spheres - Starting with your home life, think of one thing you are grateful for and describe why. Then, move to your friends, work, community, and the world and do the same.
- Senses - Use your senses to reflect. Start by giving thanks for three things you can see, then move on to hear, smell, touch, and taste.
Don’t be afraid to try something new! Humans are unique—what works for someone else might not work for you & vice versa.
As you write, here are five helpful tips:
- Be as specific as possible—specificity is key to fostering gratitude. “I’m grateful that my co-workers brought me soup when I was sick on Tuesday” will be more effective than “I’m grateful for my co-workers.”
- Get personal. Focusing on people to whom you are grateful sometimes has more of an impact than only focusing on things for which you are grateful.
- Try subtraction, not just addition. Consider what your life would be like without certain people or things, rather than just tallying up all the good stuff. Be grateful for the negative outcomes you avoided, escaped, prevented, or turned into something positive—try not to take that good fortune for granted.
- Revise if you repeat. Writing about some of the same people and things is OK, but zero in on a different aspect in detail.
- Write intentionally. Whether you write in the morning or the evening or at lunch, commit to a regular time to journal, then honor that commitment.
Gratitude Practice - Prayer
Find a quiet space where you can pray through this guided prayer without interruption or distraction.
Gratitude Practice - Prayer
Recommended Listening
To continue the conversation on Gratitude, here are some resources we recommend.
Gratitude
We'd love to hear more about how you practice gratitude & the impact gratitude has made on your life!
